Warning: This story contains distressing details
Three months after the death of their daughter Remi, Greenock Morton manager Dougie Imrie says the sounds of neonatal machines still echo in his mind. Remi was born about three and a half months early after a placenta problem, arriving at just 14 weeks premature and weighing one pound four ounces.
Dougie and his partner Lauren spent 20 intense days with their baby — days Dougie describes as both the most difficult and most precious of their lives. “We had some good days,” he says. “We thought at times she was turning a corner, and so did the staff. But, in the end, her little lungs just couldn’t get enough energy to keep her going.” Dougie and Lauren were at her side when she took her last breath.
He says talking about the experience helps him cope. “I find it easier to talk about it rather than saying nothing and letting it build up,” he explains. He hopes that by speaking openly other families who have faced similar loss might find something that helps them through their own grief.
Imrie recalls the moment during a routine mid-pregnancy scan when doctors grew unusually quiet and several staff gathered to look at the screen — the instant when everything changed. “The outside world won’t understand the emotions and the rollercoaster you go through,” he says.
Support from the Scottish football community meant a great deal. When he led his team out at Firhill, a message from Morton fans in the tunnel left a lasting impression. He was also deeply moved by the gesture from Motherwell supporters at Hearts, a show of compassion that transcended old rivalries. “That blew me and my family away,” he says. “It showed a touch of class from them.”
After Remi died in August, Dougie and Lauren wanted to do something positive in her memory. Last month they presented University Hospital Wishaw with a cheque for £18,000 raised in Remi’s honour. They said the neonatal staff had been calm, professional and incredible at caring for their daughter, and they wanted to give back so others could benefit.
Dougie acknowledges he still has raw moments and that the pain will not simply vanish. “I have lost my daughter. I will never be able to spend time with her again,” he says. Lauren visits Remi’s grave every day. “The hurt and pain will never go away,” he adds.
If you have been affected by bereavement or the issues raised in this story, you can visit the BBC Action Line for information and support on child bereavement and related services.
